I recently read the book called 'Bringing in Finn' by Sara Connell, which I loved... this African proverb was mentioned in the book and it really got me thinking ...
.jpg)
This proverb seems particularly poignant and appropriate for people going through surrogacy and adoption. The many people who have already been such a crucial part of our baby's life :
me, my husband- for supporting both me and the pregnancy without question every minute of every day, our beautiful donor, our amazing surrogate,my parents-for helping us to make this happen and for helping us over many obstacles, my best friend Emma- who's helped save me from going too insane with lengthy inspiring and soul-strengthening discussions on all my worries....Dr S, Meg, Margarida, Dr J, Dr V, the many staff at SCi who ensure we know what's happening every step of the way, my extended family, my boss who helped grant me time off as needed...I could go on...
It also seems that it's relevant for everyone who has children within their family and friend network and community. There are certain roles which everyone hopes parents will take on after having a baby. However it seems there are so many other tasks of guidance, role modelling and teaching which one hopes others will take on. We hope that friends and family members, teachers and staff at school, school friends and peers as the child's growing up will all show our child good ways to behave, how to be kind and considerate. We hope these people will show our child how to teach others and how to learn well from others. Our hopes stretch right out to the community, hoping that it will be a safe and clean environment, kept that way by everyone. Hopes that strangers will be kind to our child thus showing our child that thats the way to behave towards strangers within their immediate and their world community.
Perhaps it really does take a village to raise a child. Perhaps we have all been a part of 'raising a child' already, sometimes without even realising it.
.jpg)
This proverb seems particularly poignant and appropriate for people going through surrogacy and adoption. The many people who have already been such a crucial part of our baby's life :
me, my husband- for supporting both me and the pregnancy without question every minute of every day, our beautiful donor, our amazing surrogate,my parents-for helping us to make this happen and for helping us over many obstacles, my best friend Emma- who's helped save me from going too insane with lengthy inspiring and soul-strengthening discussions on all my worries....Dr S, Meg, Margarida, Dr J, Dr V, the many staff at SCi who ensure we know what's happening every step of the way, my extended family, my boss who helped grant me time off as needed...I could go on...
It also seems that it's relevant for everyone who has children within their family and friend network and community. There are certain roles which everyone hopes parents will take on after having a baby. However it seems there are so many other tasks of guidance, role modelling and teaching which one hopes others will take on. We hope that friends and family members, teachers and staff at school, school friends and peers as the child's growing up will all show our child good ways to behave, how to be kind and considerate. We hope these people will show our child how to teach others and how to learn well from others. Our hopes stretch right out to the community, hoping that it will be a safe and clean environment, kept that way by everyone. Hopes that strangers will be kind to our child thus showing our child that thats the way to behave towards strangers within their immediate and their world community.
Perhaps it really does take a village to raise a child. Perhaps we have all been a part of 'raising a child' already, sometimes without even realising it.
A lovely post Shakti :) I really agree that it takes more than a parent or a set of parents to raise a child. And I really liked your idea that we have all already been involved in raising children, whether directly or indirectly, and whether we have been aware of it or not. Honoured to have got a mention :) xx
ReplyDeleteVery true words. When we all work together we really can do amazing and wonderful things... x x x
ReplyDeleteYes. It takes a village to raise a child but its not the acual vilage. The village here is the parents network as you said. We are all raising kids all the time & have been raised by people who were not our parents but we considered them as much, without any one telling us so. I am a father for a 18 month old girl. My niece. My sister got a divorce. She refers to me and the father. And my niece is included in every single moment of my life till the day i die. Thats a done deal for me. I guess thats make me a parent by some how.
ReplyDelete